"Really listening and suspending one's own judgment is necessary in order to understand other people on their own terms... This is a process that requires trust and builds trust." ~ Mary Field Belenky
Do you really listen? Can you listen to a person's life and disregard your journeys to understand what they are saying? Have you ever felt or believed someone did not get you? Could it be because they were not listening?
I am definitely guilty of not listening. When I catch myself thinking of my own response or my own personal story I begin to retract the thoughts because whom I am speaking with is more important. They are telling me their story and it needs to be told. Just like yours. However, I have found it is always better to listen to your friend. Listen with your heart and mind in step with theirs. Even if you are unfamiliar. You will learn more about them and that will undoubtedly make the relationship better but you will also learn more of yourself.
Showing posts with label Courtesy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Courtesy. Show all posts
Monday, January 11, 2010
Monday, July 28, 2008
Friday, July 11, 2008
My Randon Thoughts...
^Being nice & courteous to people does not take away from your paycheck. Try it sometimes. It makes the world better.
^I now have a bootleg laptop. Platinum decided to lay her fat, overweight, lazy behind on it and broke a key. Only b/c the Doggy police would come after me did I not beat her like I wanted to.
^Since I have removed myself from certain friends & family that disrupted my spirit I am really loving, enjoying, & relishing my friends that came forward. Their light shines so much brighter.
^I have a job! Did I mention that? I still need a part-time gig b/c the state don't pay. Does anyone know of any?
^What is up with these college athletes being charged with rape? Honestly, my crew use to consist of mainly jocks & former jocks and they were a mess. Is it b/c a lot are finally getting caught or these girls are wising up & saying you know what...this shit is not right?
^I refrained from commenting on the Supreme Courts ruling on guns b/c I did not understand a lot of the outrage. I am a gun owner. Licensed. Been shooting @ a range since I was 4. I am not afraid of the licensed people carrying guns around. The average gun owner who has that natural fear & understanding of gun usage will not be crazy with it. The person I worry about is the one who picks one up on the street with no knowledge of guns besides how to pull the trigger, a hot temper, nothing to live for, a beef w/ someone or just those crazy mf's out there. That's who you should fear. News report after news report had licensed people saying - no I will not take it on the train, bus or in a restaurant, but I will shoot you if you step into my house. That's me. Sorry if you don't agree with me.
^I am helping you file for unemployment. No when I finish you cannot take me to lunch. Remember you were laid off?
^One day I am going to stop my past hurts from manifesting in my today.
^Am I really ready for a relationship? I think I am scared to death!
^I told 1 of my guy friends about a semi-cry I had over a movie & his response---"Damn girl you are showing your soft side I might have to date you!" What the hell? Am I too hard for a guy to date?
^Is it wrong to remain friends w/ all of your ex's? Even the ones that completely destroyed your heart?
^I still have Parent issues.
^Being unemployed for 1 yr. has taught me a lot. I will share one day.
^I loved it when my Buddha (Cameron) crawled off his Mommie & came crawling to me mad & crying because I was leaving the room. And then sighed when I picked him up. That's love. It feels great.
^I now have a bootleg laptop. Platinum decided to lay her fat, overweight, lazy behind on it and broke a key. Only b/c the Doggy police would come after me did I not beat her like I wanted to.
^Since I have removed myself from certain friends & family that disrupted my spirit I am really loving, enjoying, & relishing my friends that came forward. Their light shines so much brighter.
^I have a job! Did I mention that? I still need a part-time gig b/c the state don't pay. Does anyone know of any?
^What is up with these college athletes being charged with rape? Honestly, my crew use to consist of mainly jocks & former jocks and they were a mess. Is it b/c a lot are finally getting caught or these girls are wising up & saying you know what...this shit is not right?
^I refrained from commenting on the Supreme Courts ruling on guns b/c I did not understand a lot of the outrage. I am a gun owner. Licensed. Been shooting @ a range since I was 4. I am not afraid of the licensed people carrying guns around. The average gun owner who has that natural fear & understanding of gun usage will not be crazy with it. The person I worry about is the one who picks one up on the street with no knowledge of guns besides how to pull the trigger, a hot temper, nothing to live for, a beef w/ someone or just those crazy mf's out there. That's who you should fear. News report after news report had licensed people saying - no I will not take it on the train, bus or in a restaurant, but I will shoot you if you step into my house. That's me. Sorry if you don't agree with me.
^I am helping you file for unemployment. No when I finish you cannot take me to lunch. Remember you were laid off?
^One day I am going to stop my past hurts from manifesting in my today.
^Am I really ready for a relationship? I think I am scared to death!
^I told 1 of my guy friends about a semi-cry I had over a movie & his response---"Damn girl you are showing your soft side I might have to date you!" What the hell? Am I too hard for a guy to date?
^Is it wrong to remain friends w/ all of your ex's? Even the ones that completely destroyed your heart?
^I still have Parent issues.
^Being unemployed for 1 yr. has taught me a lot. I will share one day.
^I loved it when my Buddha (Cameron) crawled off his Mommie & came crawling to me mad & crying because I was leaving the room. And then sighed when I picked him up. That's love. It feels great.
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Thankful Sunday-29 June 2008
I am thankful for....
~the unmoving, non-changing rock that is my Mommie (yes, I call her that...or Ma)
~that my baby sis is growing up & I have not had to kill or her or had the notion to (not something I could say 3 yrs. ago)
~my apartment. I have been unemployed for almost 1 yr. & my folks have footed the bill (Thanks Old People)
~the unmoving, non-changing rock that is my Mommie (yes, I call her that...or Ma)
~that my baby sis is growing up & I have not had to kill or her or had the notion to (not something I could say 3 yrs. ago)
~my apartment. I have been unemployed for almost 1 yr. & my folks have footed the bill (Thanks Old People)
Their 40th High School Class Reunion---seat dancing
~my nephew Cameron Isaiah. When I walk into the room I am all he sees. He forgets his Grandma (his caregiver while my sis in in school & @ work), his Granddaddy who screams his name. I couldn't do what I was suppose to do back home b/c he fussed every time I left the room. To be loved so much is a blessing. 
~my Mommie taking me grocery shopping and spending time finding food that she "thinks" I should be eating. (I have lost a lot of weight during my unemployment. Parents are getting concerned.)
~my cousin Randall. My baby died last Saturday. He gave me 1 of his old phones. Not in the same game as my baby but I do have a phone.
~my cousin Chase. Emailing me & saying he still is missing me in Hawaii. How am I going to let him go back to Iraq? I stole his combat pillow...do you think that will help?
~my cousin Randall. He always makes me feel cherished. In his mind I am still that little girl who needs watching.
(He was the designated walker w/ me to & from elementary school. My independent self made him walk behind me b/c I could do it myself!)
~my baby Platinum. She has been without me for 2 weeks. When she finally walked out of the bathroom (loves the cold tiles) she was sooooo happy!
~my Sony Vaio!!! It helps me keep in touch w/ all of you and the world wide web! What did I do before?
~my Mommie taking me grocery shopping and spending time finding food that she "thinks" I should be eating. (I have lost a lot of weight during my unemployment. Parents are getting concerned.)
~my cousin Randall. My baby died last Saturday. He gave me 1 of his old phones. Not in the same game as my baby but I do have a phone.
~my cousin Chase. Emailing me & saying he still is missing me in Hawaii. How am I going to let him go back to Iraq? I stole his combat pillow...do you think that will help?
~my cousin Randall. He always makes me feel cherished. In his mind I am still that little girl who needs watching.
(He was the designated walker w/ me to & from elementary school. My independent self made him walk behind me b/c I could do it myself!)~my baby Platinum. She has been without me for 2 weeks. When she finally walked out of the bathroom (loves the cold tiles) she was sooooo happy!
~my Sony Vaio!!! It helps me keep in touch w/ all of you and the world wide web! What did I do before?
~Mommie giving me baby sis's dishes when we THOUGHT she was going off to school. (Pregnant her senior yr. @ home going to college.)
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Another Opportunity
I have another opportunity to make a good impression. Tomorrow I will take 3 test for a position here in ATL. 2 written, one typing. This will hopefully end a whoooolllleeee better than the meltdown of last week. Anything will be better than that.
So....
I received good/news bad news. Back in the beginning of my unemployment stint I interviewed with a local university as one of the 2 finalist. I knew I had the job. Enjoyed the 4 different personalities that interviewed me, had no doubt that I could handle and succeed at the position. Never heard from them. Never heard from that. Ain't that some _____. So today I decided to email my main contact for position because this process (being a finalist and not receiving a phone call back) continues to happen. (Don't get me started on the lack of courtesy when it comes to human resources in companies.) Really I need an ego boost so I was crossing my fingers that she would say it was not me as my inner demon keeps trying to tell. SHE did! :) Like most companies they hire from within and the other applicant worked in the school in a different department and that was her advantage. She said that I was a strong candidate and should continue to apply.
My ego needed that.
The bad news. I reached out to another position which I interviewed for and once again they hired someone else. My beef? Can you call a sista and let her know? The contact I spoke with was shocked that the hiring managers did not send out a letter or make a phone call. I wanted to tell I wasn't, but didn't think that was good business. It would have came out so sarcastic I would have offended her.
So my ego is doing better. And I will once again keep up the grind of finding employment.
So....
I received good/news bad news. Back in the beginning of my unemployment stint I interviewed with a local university as one of the 2 finalist. I knew I had the job. Enjoyed the 4 different personalities that interviewed me, had no doubt that I could handle and succeed at the position. Never heard from them. Never heard from that. Ain't that some _____. So today I decided to email my main contact for position because this process (being a finalist and not receiving a phone call back) continues to happen. (Don't get me started on the lack of courtesy when it comes to human resources in companies.) Really I need an ego boost so I was crossing my fingers that she would say it was not me as my inner demon keeps trying to tell. SHE did! :) Like most companies they hire from within and the other applicant worked in the school in a different department and that was her advantage. She said that I was a strong candidate and should continue to apply.
My ego needed that.
The bad news. I reached out to another position which I interviewed for and once again they hired someone else. My beef? Can you call a sista and let her know? The contact I spoke with was shocked that the hiring managers did not send out a letter or make a phone call. I wanted to tell I wasn't, but didn't think that was good business. It would have came out so sarcastic I would have offended her.
So my ego is doing better. And I will once again keep up the grind of finding employment.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Quote of the Day
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Interview
UPDATE....
Well I had my interview and I believe it went well. The interviewers actually seemed interested in what I had to say and from what the position calls for I believe I have what it takes to do the job. Hopefully, I will receive a positive callback. Downside to the interview...I got a $10 ticket. Broke...not enough $ to put in the meter since pennies mean nothing now! UGH!!!
I have an interview tomorrow morning. I am so excited. I have had 2 interviews so far this year. That means a lot since I have been out of work since July 2007. WOW. Who would have thunk that it would be this long? My emotions have ran the gamut. From excitement that I did not have to get up at the crack of dawn to fight Atlanta traffic to complete depression and misery. More misery than excitement since money is gone and I am depending on the kindness of my family. And their kindness is running out of steam. Probably ran out a long time ago.
I am hopeful and prayerful that this interview goes well and I receive a call back for a second or at least a job offer. What I have experienced in this search is the lack of common sense or decency might be the better word, in the business world. I have had 2 previous interviews were I was a finalist and was told that I would receive a phone call either way. Never got that phone call. One would not reply to email or voicemail messages. What does that say about the company and more importantly what does that say about how we treat individuals? We treat each other poorly and I am not speaking of the job market specifically, but in the whole scheme of our world. I was so tempted to call my interviewers and ask them how they would feel if after searching and being out of work for 5 months they would feel if they never received a phone call after being told they would? How would they feel if after taking the time to re-work their resume and cover letter they never received a response that at the least say you are not what we are looking for? Most businesses do not take the time for that courtesy. And it is a simple courtesy. There is software available in the recruiter world that allows for a generic response --a yea or nay. I have found that the smaller and non-profit organizations are more courteous and send out letter...yes snail mail letter. What a treat to receive that letter! Yes I am disappointed that it was a reject letter but pleased that someone took the time to understand that the applicant likes to know and more importantly deserves to know that they did not meet the qualifications. Gracious people.
Well I had my interview and I believe it went well. The interviewers actually seemed interested in what I had to say and from what the position calls for I believe I have what it takes to do the job. Hopefully, I will receive a positive callback. Downside to the interview...I got a $10 ticket. Broke...not enough $ to put in the meter since pennies mean nothing now! UGH!!!
I have an interview tomorrow morning. I am so excited. I have had 2 interviews so far this year. That means a lot since I have been out of work since July 2007. WOW. Who would have thunk that it would be this long? My emotions have ran the gamut. From excitement that I did not have to get up at the crack of dawn to fight Atlanta traffic to complete depression and misery. More misery than excitement since money is gone and I am depending on the kindness of my family. And their kindness is running out of steam. Probably ran out a long time ago.
I am hopeful and prayerful that this interview goes well and I receive a call back for a second or at least a job offer. What I have experienced in this search is the lack of common sense or decency might be the better word, in the business world. I have had 2 previous interviews were I was a finalist and was told that I would receive a phone call either way. Never got that phone call. One would not reply to email or voicemail messages. What does that say about the company and more importantly what does that say about how we treat individuals? We treat each other poorly and I am not speaking of the job market specifically, but in the whole scheme of our world. I was so tempted to call my interviewers and ask them how they would feel if after searching and being out of work for 5 months they would feel if they never received a phone call after being told they would? How would they feel if after taking the time to re-work their resume and cover letter they never received a response that at the least say you are not what we are looking for? Most businesses do not take the time for that courtesy. And it is a simple courtesy. There is software available in the recruiter world that allows for a generic response --a yea or nay. I have found that the smaller and non-profit organizations are more courteous and send out letter...yes snail mail letter. What a treat to receive that letter! Yes I am disappointed that it was a reject letter but pleased that someone took the time to understand that the applicant likes to know and more importantly deserves to know that they did not meet the qualifications. Gracious people.
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